Are you worried that if you over stress in the lead up to your Wedding, you might ruin the actual day? Read on to be happy on your Wedding day…
Weddings are supposed to be about happiness and love right? And of course without doubt, you want to be happy on your wedding day! But sometimes when we are planning for something special and meaningful, something like our Wedding Day, we can worry, stress or argue so much, that we get the very opposite of happy. So not cool right?!?
But that doesn’t have to happen to you. Try these 5 simple steps for a happy wedding day that helps lead into a happily ever after!
1 – Decide to say NO to every argument you feel coming your way
Weddings and other big moments in life can bring out the best, but also bring out the worst, in the best of us. There are so many things to agree on, work out, organise, decide on, pay for, and generally make happen. All this involves getting others to like what you like, want what you want and be on board with the way you think. But we all see things a little differently, or maybe some of us just need more time to process ideas and thoughts.
One of the most freeing things is to make a decision HERE and NOW that you will deflect all potential wedding arguments by simply not entering into them in the first place! It could be the most liberating thing you do for yourself. It will seem hard until it seems so incredibly easy – all you have to do is NOT react. You actually get to do less!!!!
Think of it this way – have you ever known someone who was just super right all the time? Like when the sky is blue, they could argue it was bright purple and you knew they would never back down and the shouting match you entered into only made things worse. But what if you said, “bright purple, wow interesting”. Let me think on that one, what an amazing observation!” Would they have wanted to argue their point or would peace and happiness be on the menu?
Doesn’t mean you give up on your wishes and dreams. You just let the dust settle and give yourself time to think and be calm. If you set yourself this goal, this simple boundary that stops your righteous and justified self in key moments, you could end up with so much more of what you wanted than ever.
Love this from MarcandAngel.com:
“Start letting grace have the last word. – We’ll only lose the arguments our pride insists on winning. When it’s more important to win arguments than love people, we need to start all over again with our faith and priorities.”
2) Is the Wedding for you and your partner or everyone else?
Ok I’m just going to say this out loud… people don’t truly deeply care about your wedding details. Only you do. There. It’s been said!
Details are nice… but will everyone notice each and every one of them, and more importantly, will you have time on the day to cherish each and every one of them? Focus on cherishing each other, after all that’s where all this started anyway right!!
Think of the best times you have had in your life. The times where you felt great love and great joy. More often than not, these were unplanned impromptu moments filled with laughter, and a warmth that comes from being with people you feel a sense of comfort around. The joy was from a feeling that can’t be pre-ordered in a party favour or let off in fireworks.
It comes from a genuine happy and love filled atmosphere that only people, and not things, can create. Your genuine love and happiness on your wedding day create this.
Have you heard that saying that goes something like: people won’t remember what you said, but they will remember how you made them feel. Well it’s like this at a wedding. You can have every party trick and favour in the retail wedding wonderland, but if you have too many of those things, they can end up barely noticed.
Let yourself and your guests stop and smell the roses. Not the just the bouquet kind, but the metaphorical love and happiness kind. If they see you smiling, laughing and dancing, if there is a warm atmosphere of true love and friendship, simple good food and drinks, no rushing, no stress or meltdowns, this is what will remind them, and you, of how you all felt on your wedding day.
It’s like booking an ABBA cover band for your next party – sure the real ABBA would have be nice – but if you have fun and go for it when they belt out Dancing Queen, you and your guests will have the time of your life!
3) Connect deeply with people rather than things
This follows on from the idea above. There is absolutely nothing wrong with having some cool shit on your Wedding Day. Feeling great in your dress, having your hair just so, booking that awesome caravan snack bar for just after your garden service. Whatever is really truly you and in your heart to do. But you only need so much of this.
The more you add, the more you have to worry about, schedule, organise and pay for. Have a few standout things, but leave time to truly connect with people. Your partner who is now your husband or wife deserves your love and attention, so look into their eyes and hold that moment, cherish it over and over. Laugh and spend quality time with your guests – remember why they are there. Not just to drink, eat and take home a goody bag. No, they are there because they mean so much that you would choose to share this sacred moment with them. So really share it with them. Be with them. Enjoy their company. Don’t be off looking at your run sheet that is so jam packed you don’t get to be a guest at your own Wedding.
4) Do not compare yourself or your Wedding to anyone else – the key is to be happy on YOUR wedding day
This is one of the most dangerous things you can do! And I know you know this – it’s like looking at someone’s social media feed and thinking that it accurately depicts their whole life. It’s a snapshot, and usually a snapshot that has been carefully curated so you only see what they want you too.
Be the exception. Don’t try and create the perfect picture – just focus on the beauty of love and life and roll with it a little more easily. If your cake falls over or your cars don’t turn up or the heavens open up with rain, find the way to laugh and feel gratitude anyway. If you have built your day on love rather than the ‘perfect schedule”, then you will have no issue with doing this. It will just come naturally.
Forget what the magazine or online Wedding looked like. Looks are deceiving. But feelings are true. So focus on how you want to feel and give that all you’ve got. Curate your feelings, not the photos you want to post on social media to show how perfect your day was. A day cherished and filled with joy, love and happiness will 100% deliver the most beautiful photos without you ever having to try even one little itty bitty bit. So just STOP trying and just love. Laugh. Because….
5) They say be happy with the small stuff, but you found love – YOU’VE ACTUALLY HIT THE JACKPOT!!! So what else do you really need on the BIG day?
Forget the small wins for a moment – although I want to point out that these are super important too! But, you’ve taken out the biggest win of all – so we’ve saved this point for last.
You found someone you love and who loves you. You already won in the game of life. This is the greatest gift. To have someone that gets you just enough but is also a little different and intrigues you. You are just as happy at a amazing dinner out as you are under the Doona bingeing on your favourite Netflix show. Keep that in mind. This is the BIG WIN. So your wedding day, is as they say, just icing on the cake.
Give these 5 simple tips a go…. and go BE HAPPY ON YOUR WEDDING DAY!
Love
The Zen BRIDE xx